3/4/14
I messed up the time I was supposed to go to therapy today. I showed
up at 2pm and it was supposed to be at 3pm. Thankfully, I have a therapist
that understands my brain sometimes gets friend on the details and he
called me to let me know. Do you guys believe in therapy? Some people believe therapy as a whole is BS; if a therapist ends up making a difference to you it's because of the type of person they are and not because of their formal
teachings. http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f35/do-you-believe-in-therapy-187920/. While others disagree. Some people think that therapy does work. Its has a number of properties that help it work: sharing your fears with someone helps to conquer those fears especially since they are supportive,
they teach you new techniques to cope, someone actually listens to you so it makes you feel like you matter, etc. http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f35/do-you-believe-in-therapy-187920/.
I think my feelings probably lie somewhere in the middle. I have been in and out of therapy, never truly dedicating myself to it for an extended period of time. Yet, there is one thing that has been continuously true for me. I ALWAYS start it when I feel like there is no other way out. When I am stressed out enough and feel like my back is up against a wall. When I feel
hopeless. Helpless. And I have to say, it does help. Whether or not it's the person, I am not really sure. I have definitely had a few hits and misses with that person. Plus, I have found that they are all different. Some talk a lot, some let you talk the whole time. Some ask questions. Some don't, really. Everyone I have ever dealt with is always comfortable with that
silence before anyone says anything. They never feel the need to fill it! What's that about, really? I guess you just have to get used to going. You have to understand that just because you are paying, that doesn't mean that it is
their job to entertain you. It's almost like you are entertaining them. One thing that I have really notice with this last one that I have been going to for two years now (we will call him Bruce) is that I wasted a lot of time with him. At least a year. And truthfully, I am unsure of whether or not it's his fault. He can't forth himself into the depths of my mind. I am guarded. I am not one to truly dig deep and he is not one to ask extremely prodding questions. I can write this now that Bruce and I have moved past this. However, I truly feel that for at least a year him and I grazed the surface of the Olympic sized swimming pool of doubts and regrets I find myself floating in daily. So this is the way our sessions would work.
I would entertain him. Entertaining others comes very naturally to me. I would tell him stories of the dudes I hooked up
with and my mother that was abusive and how I cussed the dude at 7/11 out for saying something sexual to me. There were actually points that I said, "I must be the most interesting person you met today, eh? Why was this? Why was I so interested in entertaining Bruce? Because if I entertained Bruce, I didn't have to deal with my actual reality. TRUTH IS it didn't matter if Bruce was bored out of his mind. It was my time. So should he have known that there were better
questions for him to ask me? That there was more? Or should I have worked harder to delve deeper into my psyche?
I'm digging now. And I love it. We are in the midst of discovering why I keep attracting people I need to rescue. And, I am becoming more self aware. Thanks Bruce! I'm going to leave you with a psychologytoday.com link on how to pick a good therapist.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/freudian-sip/201102/how-find-the-best-therapist-you.
See you soon people!!
I messed up the time I was supposed to go to therapy today. I showed
up at 2pm and it was supposed to be at 3pm. Thankfully, I have a therapist
that understands my brain sometimes gets friend on the details and he
called me to let me know. Do you guys believe in therapy? Some people believe therapy as a whole is BS; if a therapist ends up making a difference to you it's because of the type of person they are and not because of their formal
teachings. http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f35/do-you-believe-in-therapy-187920/. While others disagree. Some people think that therapy does work. Its has a number of properties that help it work: sharing your fears with someone helps to conquer those fears especially since they are supportive,
they teach you new techniques to cope, someone actually listens to you so it makes you feel like you matter, etc. http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f35/do-you-believe-in-therapy-187920/.
I think my feelings probably lie somewhere in the middle. I have been in and out of therapy, never truly dedicating myself to it for an extended period of time. Yet, there is one thing that has been continuously true for me. I ALWAYS start it when I feel like there is no other way out. When I am stressed out enough and feel like my back is up against a wall. When I feel
hopeless. Helpless. And I have to say, it does help. Whether or not it's the person, I am not really sure. I have definitely had a few hits and misses with that person. Plus, I have found that they are all different. Some talk a lot, some let you talk the whole time. Some ask questions. Some don't, really. Everyone I have ever dealt with is always comfortable with that
silence before anyone says anything. They never feel the need to fill it! What's that about, really? I guess you just have to get used to going. You have to understand that just because you are paying, that doesn't mean that it is
their job to entertain you. It's almost like you are entertaining them. One thing that I have really notice with this last one that I have been going to for two years now (we will call him Bruce) is that I wasted a lot of time with him. At least a year. And truthfully, I am unsure of whether or not it's his fault. He can't forth himself into the depths of my mind. I am guarded. I am not one to truly dig deep and he is not one to ask extremely prodding questions. I can write this now that Bruce and I have moved past this. However, I truly feel that for at least a year him and I grazed the surface of the Olympic sized swimming pool of doubts and regrets I find myself floating in daily. So this is the way our sessions would work.
I would entertain him. Entertaining others comes very naturally to me. I would tell him stories of the dudes I hooked up
with and my mother that was abusive and how I cussed the dude at 7/11 out for saying something sexual to me. There were actually points that I said, "I must be the most interesting person you met today, eh? Why was this? Why was I so interested in entertaining Bruce? Because if I entertained Bruce, I didn't have to deal with my actual reality. TRUTH IS it didn't matter if Bruce was bored out of his mind. It was my time. So should he have known that there were better
questions for him to ask me? That there was more? Or should I have worked harder to delve deeper into my psyche?
I'm digging now. And I love it. We are in the midst of discovering why I keep attracting people I need to rescue. And, I am becoming more self aware. Thanks Bruce! I'm going to leave you with a psychologytoday.com link on how to pick a good therapist.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/freudian-sip/201102/how-find-the-best-therapist-you.
See you soon people!!